disrupts | NOCTIUM IC INBOX

[ Their ride's an all-encompassing trip of sensation, from the way the wind whips in V's face and the sound of Robert's laughter just about audible above the sound of the engine. He's never heard Johnny laugh like that, with such a lack of cynicism that it's practically wild abandon. The adrenaline's coursing through his veins and though he's got a synaptic accelerator working on his behalf, he can still feel the heights Robert's adrenaline is reaching.

Simply put; this is fuckin' preem, the kind of experience that's likely to stick out in his mind too as unforgettable. He doesn't know how he should feel about that, if the fact that he's enjoying this more with Robert than with Johnny means he should feel like he betrayed the older man's trust, somehow.

Regardless, he eases off the throttle, the bike still smoothly zipping across the tarmac below. Least if he slows down a little he can actually talk. ]

Fast enough for ya?

Hell yeah! [A reply that’s still a little wobbly with receding laughter. Robert feels his heart beating in his throat, his limbs staticky-numb from the adrenaline surge. It’s like he’s ran a marathon, and all he’s done is hold onto dear life on the back of this bike.] I’m not scared to admit it: you know what you’re doin’. Never gone that fast. Ever.

[Since they’re moving at a pace a little slower than breaking the sound barrier, Robert eases his grip, but only a little. Their sync throbs between them, buzzing and bracing. Looped between two people sharing the same experience.]

Damn, so this Synchrony thing… It means you feel that, too, right?

[That fluttering excitement, feeling like something liquid moving through him.]

Mmhmm. Synchrony's just like... sharin' what ya feel with somebody else. Closer two people are, stronger it is.

[ Usually with Johnny it's a cacophony of feelings that are so intense, so all-consuming, that it's hard to really pick apart everything that V feels, and what Johnny feels. With Robert it's more straightforward, less overwhelming and more a chill kind of vibe that feels like a pleasant buzz. He and Robert aren't connected in the same way that he and Johnny are, but V can appreciate the differences and enjoy them both all the same.

If V was worried that his feelings for Johnny might slip through somewhere, it'd be easy enough to chalk some of that up to how he feels in the moment. Clearly he's a big fan of riding fast, and being able to share that with somebody else who's just as into it feels good. ]

So - prob'ly didn't get the memo on that, but... all of us gembonded need Synchrony here. Die 'thout it. Turn into some rock... sounds fucked up, know it does.

[ Maybe he shouldn't be explaining this right in this second, and after a moment of contemplating he switches avenue. ]

Ya wanna try ridin' her?

[Die? A smidgen of alarm sluices through their connection, though one can hardly blame him. Not exactly what he wanted to hear, though he did get the run-down from a native or two before he met V; he knows that it's an important part of their vital functions (as well as functioning as cash on the side), so to hear that going without it for so long leads to death-by-turning-into-a-rock? You know, that about tracks given everything else that's happened by now.]

I was told a little about it. Know that we gotta do it just to pay to eat -- and dyin' isn’t something I want on my radar for a long time. [Ah, the irony in that.] But if the connection is stronger the closer two people are-

[He lets that thought fall off, as if he wasn't sure where he was taking it, either. But V's question is heard and not totally ignored, just slotted into the back of his brain for now, because Robert picks up where he left off just a second later. Fingers push a little harder into the fabric of V's shirt, his arms still wrapped around him to hold steady, as if wondering just what a stronger sync might feel like. The implication isn't terribly subtle.]

You wanna help me with that, too?

[Robert apaprently isn't lacking in Johnny's boldness, casual as he says it, clearly fishing for some interest.]

[ Riding without being beyond drunk on Synchrony is doable, but Robert's fingers tightening just that little bit into his shirt provokes two distinct reactions. Definitely a little harder to ride when somebody's propositioning him in a round-about way. But mostly Robert can probably feel rumble of laughter in V's chest, and some endearment slips through the connection.

This is... wild. ]

Didn't mean physically closer. Meant two people who're emotionally close... it's uh. Yeah. Can't 'zactly describe how that feels. Don't got the words.

[ While it might be weird talking about this with Robert, the young version of the exact person who has that kind of effect on him, V's open enough to not feel embarrassed by it. It is what it is and he's not the choom denying that. ]

Curious 'bout what ya thought you were gonna do on the back of a bike, though.

[ Maybe he's teasing a little, and for a brief moment he takes his optics off the road and glances back over his shoulder at the younger man sat behind him. He's smirking; there's no doubt he's just playing around. ]

[Robert's eyes are glinting and searching, wind tousling his hair back the whole while. It's hard to know what to make of V's response -- it's not exactly a rejection in the most immediate way, and it's wrapped up in good humor to boot. Catching that smirk on his lips, the merc's profile cast against the sun's light, entwined with the rumbling engine and the murmuring sync, momentarily stalls out any quip he had ready to launch back.]

Uh...

[Christ. A moment and he recovers.]

Nothin' back here, but find a remote place to stop and I'm sure we could figure somethin' out.

[He smirks right back, a little lopsided. A little, you know. Flirty.]

I don't have a problem with just 'physical'. Do you?

[ All of this really is like some departure from a reality that's not even their own to start with. For a long moment, V has absolutely no idea what to do with that. If his apparent taste in men hadn't been clear enough, Robert's a few decades shy of what generally turns V's head. At least, it is when it comes to V's most recent forays into a variety of things that could be messily called 'romantic relationships'.

'course, the fact that this is the painfully young version of one of those men who's had more than just V's eye for a while now barely scratches the surface. Age doesn't mean much back home, legal's fair game as far as most people figure it. And V's not discounting Robert on his age; not exactly. Hardly like Robert's not preem to look at, and he's fun in a way V's barely known Johnny to be. Kid's 18, yeah, but he's also the past version of a man who's made it clear enough that he's just not interested in V like that.

Except... that thought alone is splintering certain beliefs that V's holds into too many different pieces. Johnny's tastes either changed as he got older or... he'd been lying. The way their Synchrony feels? Now V's slowly coming to the realization that lying's probably what it is. He just doesn't know why.

Aware that he's been quiet for too long, his optics are already back on the road ahead, but he's slowing the bike down gently, plans to stop just off the road and try to explain why he just can't. Not when he knows that, for whatever reason, Johnny didn't want to do this with him. ]

[It’s not so complicated on Robert’s end. Yeah, he’s attracted to the guy, and yeah, he could do for the distraction, especially if it benefits them both in the end through Synchrony. Win-win, as long as V’s into it; and he gets the feeling that this whole city is pretty casual about hooking up even for a one night stand, given the nature of syncing. He didn’t have to be on this world very long to puzzle that out.

Problem is, now he’s getting mixed signals. V hasn’t said no, but he’s not saying much of anything, either. But now they’re coming to a stop, and Robert kicks out a leg to keep them balanced, loosening his grip on the nomad.]

‘Side of the road in the middle of nowhere’ isn’t exactly what I had in mind, but all right.

[Prodding for intention, here, with quipping humor.]

You gonna pull something kinky on me, ‘least warn me first.

[ With Robert still sat behind him, V's boot hits the dirt too, fingers deftly twisting the old-fashioned key in the ignition, and the engine dies. The silence at the end of Robert's sentence yawns, a gulf of quiet peppered only with the sounds of indigenous bugs. Makes him think about that saying about being a fly on the wall. Part of him wonders if Johnny's going to remember any of this, whenever this latest spell of weird is all over.

Realizing that he's hardly being clear about what it is he's expecting to happen here, he glances over his shoulder again and tilts his head; hop off, the gesture says. He'd rather be facing the kid than try having this conversation on the back of the bike. ]

Nothin' kinky, I promise.

[The silence grows prominent enough to wander straight into awkward town, and Robert starts to think that a) he’s really revved V’s proverbial engine to the point where they’re just gonna fuck on the side of the road or b) this is all turning into a simple ‘no’. And being young but not totally stupid, he has a proper idea of which one’s about to happen.

Which is… fine, really. No hearts broken over it, he barely knows the guy if that’s the case. But making a display of it borders on the territory of weird, but he figures there’s no point in getting ahead of himself. Might as well see what plays out.

Robert obediently (that’s new, too) hops off the bike in one smooth motion, turning to face V, cocking his brow and splaying both hands as if to say, “Okay, what now?”]

[ It's weird, no doubt, but the instant Robert slides off the bike without a single word of discontent is downright bizarre. V doubletakes, like he has no idea what to do with that information either and his hands are already full of that. Kicking the stand down, he stays straddled over the bike, though at least he can see Robert now rather than having him out of sight. Mostly, V just doesn't want to be an asshole, even if the choom standing in front of him grows up to be the biggest asshole he knows.

Just so happens Johnny's an asshole V's more than just fond of.

So, he's going to extend Robert the same kind of care that he would to a man who'd outright deny needing it. It won't make any sense at all to the younger man but, to V, it's important. ]

This is gonna sound weird, but uh... just let me say my shit 'n you can decide what we do after.

[ Just to preface this before the weirdness gets so under his skin that it's barely silent anymore. Might as well just name it. ]

'm real fuckin' glad we didn't meet last month. 'cause I think-- I know I woulda stopped this bike to fuck you 'n not thought anythin' 'bout that.

[ Yeah, now he probably sounds a little like he's verging on the almost-cyberpyscho he was not all too long ago. ]

Thing is I want to. I really do. You're uh... [ He gestures here, a hand lifting as if to say 'look at ya'. ] But I can't. 'cause if I did, I'd be takin' advantage of the situation. And I'd be breakin' the trust of an asshole you don't know, but I can't think of anythin' worse. I just...

[ Yeah, this is awkward. Real awkward. ]

...love his gonk ass 'zactly how he is.

[ Not much better. Shaking his head, V looks away and scrubs a hand through his beard. Fuck, this would've been ten times better at speed because at least then there'd be some kind of distraction. ]

What I meant to say's that uh... there's somebody else. And if we fucked? Don't think I could look 'im in the eye again 'cause I know this ain't how he'd want it. Even if he is a fuckin' stubborn asshole.

[ Was that so hard? Apparently. ]

If you're still down 'n didn't die just from my awkward explanation, you can ride us back into the city. Show ya a few places that don't got tumbleweed as the main attraction.

[Robert shifts his weight to his other leg, listening to what V has to say. And in the end, it’s a lot. More than what he was really expecting, more than what he probably needed to know. It’s… strange, in a way he can’t explain, but V’s loyalty tugs at his empathy, and makes him feel a little bad for even bringing it up. V and this other guy — well, it sounds complicated, but he can tell by the look in his eyes, the sincerity in his tone, that it’s something that Robert has no chance to even match. Not that it was ever in the cards.

When V’s done, offering the bike a second time, Robert shakes his head and huffs out breath.]

Listen, V… I’m not here to stir the pot, or to wedge my way into someone’s love life. Not my intention, and didn’t mean to put you on the spot. You really don’t owe me an explanation, don’t need to do—

[A gesture at the landscape.]

—all this. If things get too complicated, all you gotta do is tell someone they ain’t your type.

[His look’s gone quizzical, stepping forward. It’s a shame—he’d really like to feel this man’s hands all over him—but Robert isn’t willing to pick up any baggage he can’t handle. He’s already got enough to worry about.]

So I’ll drop it, and I’ll take you up on the offer to take your bike for a spin. But you just gotta let me do one thing first.

[ Halfway to offering a 'don't worry 'bout it', the moment Robert's giving him advice on how to deal with things when they get too complicated, V's voice dies in his throat. In the short amount of time since actually talking to Robert, somehow he's gotten more answers to questions that he's been asking Johnny about for a while now. For a moment he just sits on the back of that bike, frowning into the middle-distance. ]

Uh, thanks. For the pro tip.

[ Sounds familiar. Achingly familiar. Least there's an additional request which pulls his spiraling thoughts aside for long enough to answer: ]

Okay. Name it.

[Blessedly oblivious to the avenues of new information he's opening for V, much less how much more difficult he's making life for his older self, Robert barely waits for V to respond before he's closing that space between them. A hand reaches out to fist into the merc's shirt, pulling him inches forward, and the almost-eighteen-year-old leans in to steal a kiss.

It's a heated, selfish one. But it also doesn't linger, cheeky in its promptitude. He's pulling away as quickly as he's initiated it, a smirk on his lips and an explanation following on its heels.]

Just wanted to get a taste if I couldn't have the whole thing.

[He laughs a little -- still such a strange sound coming from him -- revealing no hurt pride, no sarcastic barbs between them. Robert simply moves away to take his seat at the front of the bike, gunning the ignition. It roars to life and he raises his voice to speak over it.]

Shame, though. Could've been like that song from the White Album. You know it?

[ Unprepared, V's actually taken by surprise, like he'd been expecting the younger man to take a swing at him instead of kissing him. Tracking Robert back to the bike with his gaze, he at least doesn't stand around like a gonk for too long after. Now that their roles are reserved, he's the choom who's got to hold on, and it's not a position he's been in for a while. In fact, last time was probably with Jackie, back in NC.

But what Robert gets for his trouble - for that laughter - is a grin, one that's acknowledging V's cool with what just happened. Least their collective attention seems to be on the same page as far as anything else goes.

Hitching up his heels until his boots are rested snugly on the boot plates, he squeezes his thighs at Robert's hips and loops an arm around his waist. The synchrony is as immediate as before, and though there's a little more heat in it this time, V's already distracted by all the shit he hadn't expected to learn today. ]

Let's see what ya made of.

[ And that's all he says for a moment, gives the younger man the figurative reins to do with as he wants, to point them in any direction he pleases.

Maybe he'd know what the White Album is given a couple more hints, but since he's not from Robert's time-- ]

The fuck's the White Album?

[He waits until V's snug up against him before he deltas them out of there. The sync is kicking back in again, and Robert feels something different about it, but he doesn't have the experience to pin down just why that might be -- might've been the convo they had, might've been the kiss. He can flatter himself into thinking the latter.

For now, the road's wide open, and he turns into it, heading back the way they came. The pavement's smooth, and though he's no nomad, he seems to have a good handle on how to ride, especially since it's just a straight shot back into the city. Robert thinks to boost the acceleration when V hits him with that question.]

What do you mean, the fuck's a White Album? 'Why Don't We Do It In The Road?' [The song he was referring to.] 'Helter Skelter'? 'While My Guitar Gently Weeps'? Come on.

[ Maybe he's heard one of those, definitely not the one Robert meant. How to explain he was born almost a hundred years after that particular band formed? He laughs either way, a low rumble not far behind Robert's ear. Yeah, getting passionate about music? Seems right. ]

Nope. What kinda song names are they anyway?

[ He's happy to let Robert wax lyrical about all the music he wants. He's listening, sure, but he can't get that piece of advice out of his head. Not my type. The fuck does that even mean now, knowing what he knows. ]

Dumbass ones. [He says bluntly, but with some amusement.] One was written after seeing some animals screw on the side of the road. The other was picked out of a dictionary. And Helter Skelter—

[Robert glances back, profile stark against the growing contours of the city beyond.]

—that one’s my favorite. Could play it for you if I had a guitar.

[Eyes back on the road, he couldn’t help but notice a shade of distraction cast across his companion’s face.]

Hey, am I borin’ you?

[ Feigning surprise seems too disingenuous, so V nods instead. It comes a moment too late, Robert's follow up question slipping in before V can clarify. ]

Nah. Enjoyin' the ride. Been a while since I was a passenger.

[ It's as good an excuse as any. It might not be the real reason, but V's banking on Robert not being able to tell when he's lying like people who know him better can. ]

Few places in the city with guitars. Least... a few 'm not banned from yet.

[He's right, Robert can't tell that he's lying. It's as good of a reason as any, and even if it wasn't, he hasn't quite enough investment to pry. Their sync feels fine, so everything must be nova, right?]

Banned? [lol what] 'Cause you told them you didn't know who the Beatles were?

Long story. Didn't like me kleppin' a guitar from 'em.

[ Which isn't exactly the whole story; not even close. The guitar in question never made it out the store, but he and Johnny did, fast lane to the local jail.

Seems like a long time ago now, but that's the thing about this place. Time itself feels skezzed some weeks. ]

The Beatles? Yeah, I heard of 'em. Can't say they were big when I was growin' up 'cept an old choom in my clan who had this antique fuckin'... uh, they called cassettes?

[He scoffs disbelievingly, the sound lost to the air whipping past.]

Little before my time, too. But yeah, they're called cassettes, and those aren't even all that old.

[Maybe if he thought about it longer, something wouldn't quite add up. V being older than he is, the math would dictate that band shouldn't be far departed from his time at all, but thankfully the notion is derailed by that "long story". How's he not going to ask about that?]

You kleppin' a guitar... Was that a merc thing?

A favor thing. Could say it was my half of a deal.

[ It was supposed to be simple, and really it should've been. Klepping that guitar should've been one of the easiest jobs he's ever done. Woulda been if him and Johnny hadn't started an argument, kept it going until the Diamond Guard had more than enough time to tackle them to the ground. ]

Got distracted. Gigs don't usually go down like that. Let my anger get the better of me. So - landed in jail, me and this uh... friend of mine.

[Must've been a hell of a distraction, he thinks to himself. A regular klep job shouldn't be so hard for a merc who claims to have made a name for himself in Night City; anger must've bubbled up pretty hard to have spilled over and fubar'd the whole thing.]

Then how 'bout you direct me to a music shop that isn't gonna immediately kick you out, and you tell me why you got so angry in the meanwhile?

[ Keeping Robert on the artery road running back into the city, V thinks back to that gig. Thinks about how he'd been fit for bursting at the seams for too long before they even dropped down into that low lit store. Thinks about how his timing never runs to anybody's convenience, not even his own.

Definitely not to Johnny's. And honestly, that'd been true the entire time they'd been stuck together inside his head.

That gig had been a disaster, but the optimist in him isn't discounting the shit that got straightened out because of it. Still, if he had a do over, he'd try save it for after. ]

'cause I got the emotional filter of a five-year old. Somethin' bothers me 'n I find it hard to just... pretend like it's not there. Add to that people who're my family, anytime I got problems with 'em, it just makes it worse.

I'm a nomad an' some shit won't ever change. Family means everythin' to me. But it also cuts down deeper than anythin' else.

Got angry 'cause I had somethin' in my head I couldn't work my way past myself. Turned into an argument right in the middle of this store we were hittin' for this axe.

[ Exhaling a laugh, he adjusts his grip at Robert's side and takes a second to look out at the buildings that slowly get bigger as they head back into the city. ]

Sounds gonk but sometimes shit like that just gotta happen 'cause otherwise it just... it eats away at ya.

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